Acceptance vs Resistance

There are many times in my life when I find a common theme that continues to appear in various ways.  Sometimes it’s a word or a phrase I hear over and over, while other times it’s a full-blown message in a book or article I am reading, but no matter where I see it, if it keeps popping up I take note.  This has happened again over the last week or so and the message I am seeing in various places is acceptance for what is.

What does that mean? When I think of acceptance I often think of the serenity prayer, specifically “accept the things I cannot change”.  It rings true to me that we should accept the things that are outside of our control, however I can’t help but wonder what if we only perceive that we cannot change it, but then again perception becomes our reality most of the time.  But this message of acceptance has come in many forms and circumstances.  It is not the message that we should simply accept the circumstances we are given and then give up hope (I don’t believe in giving up hope), but instead I feel led to accept what is right now.  

Accepting a situation for what it is right this moment does not mean it cannot change or all hope is lost.  Instead it means allowing it to be as it is now and not fighting it or resisting the reality for this moment.  Let me give you an example.  Yesterday when I received notification that my poems were not selected for publishing I was fairly disappointed at first.  Part of me was resisting the reality of the matter because I wanted them to be published so badly and I even found myself resisting the disappointment.  The reality for the moment was that the poems would not be published right now.  The reality was that I was disappointed and no matter how hard I fought those facts, they were not going to change, at least not at that time.  The best choice was to accept it as is.  My partner was actually the person that helped remind me of the choice I had to focus on the positive, but that didn’t mean I couldn’t allow the feeling of disappointment to be there. I just had to choose not to allow it to take over.  And that is what I did.

This idea of acceptance came in another conversation regarding accepting people for who they are, not who you wish them to be.  Often times I have the ability to see the potential in people even when they ate not living up to it or can’t see it in themselves.  Yet sometimes I expect too much and instead if accepting who that person is right now, I fight against it by setting expectations that I know they won’t reach (at least right now).  This is a rocky road to tread on because it almost always leads to disappointment on my part.

So how does this apply to accomplishing our dreams?  In my opinion by accepting what is right now we are allowing ourselves to  free up some of our much-needed energy by letting go of the resistance and allowing things to be as they are.  It doesn’t mean we can’t change it because sometimes we can, but there are also times when we must learn to let go. I am not suggesting we let go of the possibility of our dreams, but instead letting go of the way we wish our dreams to meet reality.  While we may believe we know the best way, or the most realistic way for our dreams to come true, the truth is we don’t know all the ways and sometimes the best way, is to let go just a little bit and allow life to be magical again.

Why spend so much time resisting the things we can’t change right this instant, when acceptance can be so freeing?  I know it’s easier said than done, but I believe it is worth the practice to accept what is and open our hearts and minds to other possibilities.

What will you accept today?