I began my day today noticing various aspects about the world, my son, and myself that put a smile on my face and gratitude in my heart. My son is turning 3 this weekend and I am so grateful that he is healthy, vibrant, and quite the entertainer. Life is good, I am loved, healthy, and in a good place. It seemed that nothing could ruin my mood today and it was quite lovely. Until…
Well that’s the thing, there wasn’t anything in particular that happened to dull the vibrant happy I was feeling, it just sort of wore off a bit. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t fall to the other end of the emotional spectrum and feel upset, angry, or sad. I just wasn’t on the same cloud I was on earlier in the morning. It got me wondering what happened and how can I get that feeling back?
Just before the happy seemed to fade I had written a poem/greeting card about happiness and the words spoke to me so much that I think I had my answer before the question was formed in my mind. I realized the idea of “happiness” for many people (me included) stems primarily from a future point in time. The good feeling comes with thinking of what is coming down the pike or what we are looking forward to. I know I have always had a tendency to look into the future for the best things to come and incidentally I miss the good stuff that is all around me. Not only that, but the good stuff around me doesn’t seem to compare to the future event that I have created in my mind. And yet when that moment comes, I may feel happy it is here, but it is only momentarily until I am waiting for the next future moment to be happy about.
As I was pondering this thought, I realized the importance of not only being happy in the moment, but training the happy.
What is that?
Training the happy simply means doing things in the moment that remind you of the good stuff here and now. Seeing the beauty around you and being grateful for it. Finding the positive aspects of life in each and every situation. Sure it may seem difficult at first, but the more you practice it, the more you train yourself to be happy now, the easier it is to let go of the idea that you will be happy when…whatever happens. You can be happy now, you just have to train yourself to see the good.
So, as my jovial feeling was dulling, I began thinking of the things that make me happy and I wrote some of them down. My son’s smile. His laughter. The silly things he says and how happy he is to see me when he gets home. The fact that we found the cake he wanted for his birthday after thinking it wasn’t available. The sunshine.
I then found my happy factor increasing and the positive thoughts multiplying in my head. One thought led to another etc. And while it may seem amazing in the moment, it’s no rocket science. The process is simple. Think of what makes you feel good and keep that going. Sooner or later you will find yourself looking for the good feelings on a regular basis and your happy mood will be the new normal for right now. And when the future moment comes that knocks your happy socks off, you will savor it fully in the moment and the next because you know there are many happy moments to be celebrated.
So, the next time you find yourself feeling less than joyful, use it as an opportunity to train your happy. In fact don’t wait for that moment. Start right now! Make a list of 20 positive aspects about you, your life, your surroundings, your job, your spouse, etc., and watch your happy factor multiply.
What else do you do to increase your happy?